[ A huff gusts out of him, its humor disbelieving. ]

No-name, huh? Doesn't that mean when you make it big, I could be rolling in Dennies for having ultra exclusive merch?

[ (not that his sentimental ass would sell an autograph but nobody needs to know that) ]

How about we split the difference and I offer you... [ a quiet rummaging ] — lemon? Or no? Too sour?